Chrissy Marquardt of The Courageous Visionary

Tell us about your business.

I am a life coach and healer. I work with women who are ready to let go of resistance and step into surrender, and ready to follow that spark of curiosity that has been tugging at their heart and calling for them to wake up and pay attention.

My three part framework: (1) I hold space for women to have the courage to say yes to their desires without guilt and no to the warm embrace of comfort without fear. (2) I guide you to realize that your deepest desires are worthy of your surrender, your courage, and your pursuit (3) I embody you to dance courageously with the demons in your heart, so that your angels can sing.

Certifications: I am a certified Awaken Your Life Master Coach and also a certified NLP practitioner.

What or who has been your greatest influence in business and why?

My coach, Andrea Leda, whom I have been working with for the past three years. My own inner mentor and healer that's been guiding me on this path and Brene Brown.

What would you say is your greatest business success to date?

Not quitting, taking action, and discovering my self-worth as a business owner. Being able to charge premium prices for web design and consultation services without guilt.

What is the greatest obstacle you have faced in your business?

The greatest obstacle I have faced in my business is changing my identity around money and self-worth. In my previous business as a web designer, I struggled for years with setting client boundaries, under charging and devaluing my prices, letting the market dictate what I should charge for my services instead of the other way around. Underlying all of that was a core belief that I was not good enough and that because I didn’t have professional training as a web designer, that I didn’t deserve to charge higher prices. Severe case of imposter syndrome where my self-worth and value spent time in the ICU.

What are the things that help you stay organized and get things done?

Google calendar and Calendly for scheduling, my daily and weekly passion planner for planning and goal setting. Google Drive for organization, Quickbooks and Moonclerk for finances and invoices. Photoshop for graphic design. LastPass for password management.

Since you are also a mom, how do you balance everything?

I try to have dedicated blocks of time for personal time and business time. I set clear boundaries with my kids and my family when I’m in my home office. I hire help for my 5 year old 3 days a week, and work when the older boys are doing school work. If my husband happens to be home, I communicate with him ahead of time so he knows not to interrupt me if I’m on a call or working on a project.

Do you think being a mom has helped you with the success of your business? if so, how?

Absolutely! It's made me more intentional with my time. The part of me that wants to be a successful business owner and the part of me that wants to be a good mom to my kids - both parts want the same thing, which is to raise empowered, conscious men and to live a legacy of courage and possibility. My kids drive me to be more successful and help me to main the work/family balance that’s important.

What advice would you give to other moms who dream about starting their own business, but they don’t think they can do it all?

Be realistic about what you can and cannot do in the beginning. Don't be afraid to ask for help from friends and family members. Even one hour to yourself to work on your business is a huge help.

Don’t be afraid to get curious and explore what calls to you beyond motherhood - often times you will surprised at what you find. Recognize that balancing family and work is a practice and a process that requires discipline and consistency. Don’t let one bad day cause you to give up. Be firm in your boundaries.

And last but by no means least, do the inner work. Running a business, especially as a mother, will cause you to confront every inner demon that you've tucked away in the echo chambers of your heart.as you continue to grow and evolve as a mother and a business owner, have the courage to face your inner demons so that your angels can sing, and your business can be successful.

Do you have any stories you’d like to share that may amuse, entertain or inspire others?

I’ve always been that person that’s full of a million ideas. It seemed that my perpetual problem was trying to implement all of my million ideas at the same time. I was always willing to go all-in on something that interested me but quickly lost interest when it “didn’t work out” the way that I expected it to.

It felt that I was always seeking novelty from each new idea, tactic, or strategy that came across my radar, thinking that each new “thing” would help me to find what I was looking for. I was more in love with the potential possibility and the outcome of something, rather than being willing to fall in love with the process of getting to my results.

I quite literally spent my days in fomo instead of jomo. I almost never gave myself space and time to go deeper to bring my next big idea to fruition. Instead, I chose to cast my net wider and wider, always doing more and more, leaving a trail of unrealized potential and dreams that eventually faded away into the cobwebs of my subconscious mind and heart, to collect dust.

I was living my best life in the comfort zone of shiny objects, distractions, and excess productivity. Doing for the sake of doing without direction or aim. All of that changed on October 27, 2018, when I gently but lovingly got called out on my bullshit by my coach.

I was participating in a group coaching session, learning about the light and shadow side of our primary human drivers. I was unfamiliar with the concept and learned that our shadow side is an unacknowledged part of our personality that can inhibit us from moving forward, especially when we are attempting to make a significant change in our lives. Our human drivers are our basic human needs and explain why we do what we do.

When I learned about the light and shadow side of love & connection as a driver, that felt like the “easy” choice. It didn’t quite feel complete, but it felt convenient. And then I heard about variety & uncertainty.

The light: “risk-takers, likes surprises, creativity, experiences, novelty..”

The shadow: “not enough clarity, lack of predictability, indecisiveness..”

And the one that completely stopped me in my tracks “...inconsistency is their consistency.”

That sounded exactly like me. And as I had that initial thought, up came my walls and my dam of denial. My fragile ego was unwilling to wrap it’s mind around everything I had just heard. I was unwilling to tell the truth about myself to myself. In an attempt to be validated by my “easier” choice, I tried, unsuccessfully, to convince my coach that I belonged over in love & connection, and I was no longer the person who belonged over in variety & uncertainty. That was not me.

She wisely responded: “our primary drivers do not change unless we experience trauma. You may have handed the map to love and connection, but if variety & uncertainty is where you have been all of your life, then that is where you need to be.”

She said something in a way in a way that I had never heard before. And when I heard those things, it stirred things within me that I didn’t even know needed to be stirred up. The dam of denial broke. Every single demon that I had ever buried and stuffed away in the graveyard of my heart, clawed their way through to my conscious mind. They started to kick around the dust in my heart chambers, and stir up the emotional cobwebs of shame, fear, worthiness, embarrassment, and all of the stories associated with those emotions. Ready to confront me and ready for a wrestling match. I saw them clearly for the first time, and they scared the shit out of me.

I was both lost and found at that moment. I was lost, because the shaky foundation upon which I had built my life and my identity had been completely shattered. I was found because my heart finally had her moment to speak up for the first time in a very long time.

I continually lost the wrestling match with my demons for about 6 months before I could muster the courage to start having conversations with them outside the wrestling ring. Eventually, we skipped the wrestling matches altogether and started meeting for coffee and tea instead. Our confrontations turned into conversations and I was finally able to hear the lessons they had been trying to pass on all along. That the thing that I was seeking all along was within me, seeking me too.

That my value, my worth, and my being come from within me, not from outside of me. External self-worth is dissatisfying and utterly exhausting. That when I ignore the things I fear the most, it doesn’t go away or disappear into the ethers. It manifests itself in other areas of my life - my business, my clients, my money, and my relationships.

Knowing that my self-worth and value comes from within me gave me the freedom to stop doubting myself, to stop doing more, and to start doing less. To go deeper instead of wider and to create space in my life for the miracle of coming back to myself through self-love, clarity, and purpose. My life is now happening for me in the discomfort zone, and I willingly embrace the darkness of my shadow to find the clarity of my light on the other side of the discomfort. Instead of a wrestling match, I have the courage to show up each day to dance with the demons in my heart, so that my angels can rejoice and sing.